We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
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