I want to stick my p in your. b.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
