You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
a search helicopter?!
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
