Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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