this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
