I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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