is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
tell me about the fingering
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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