he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
