You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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