You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
