I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize