"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
More tranny stories later!
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
