I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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