Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
