I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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