True but thats because hes a fetus.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
