So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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