My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
My butt remains clenched, sir.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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