My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize