my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
