My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
