I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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