is your mom at the bar?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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