After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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