But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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