matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!