is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fill condoms, not promises.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize