She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
