He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
