I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Randomize
