so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
