one two three fourrrrnication!
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You left your phone here
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