That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
