Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize