Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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