I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
