; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize