Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
