He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
