ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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