Apparently you make a good broom.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
