I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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