Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
