its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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