I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
im about as happy as oj after his trial
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back