You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
