Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
