He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
