We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
