I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize