"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
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