I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
